There's this guy in the ME deptartment that I always walk by. Like I pass him everywhere. Are our lives diametrically opposed? Anyways I make it a point to smile at him everytime I walk by. Maybe sometime I'll find out his name. I've been meeting other older MEs at a startling rate lately. The classes are so easy to get out of sync and if you have to retake a class it gets worse. So I'm in classes with people who are close to graduating etc. As much as I'd like to have the luxury of taking as long as I like to finish school, I'm under contract.

I feel so relaxed now that my fluids test is over. I did four loads of laundry last night in lieu of studying.

They say my account is going to be hijacked. I get that warning every time I log in. I love getting grandfathered in on insecure passwords.


Anyways.

I kinda like where my life is right now.

My job is easy. I'm sure I'll get busier as their homework gets harder, maybe after their first test xD But I don't foresee it getting reaaaaally bad. Especially not on friday afternoons xD

Apartment life is going pretty well. Leo fits in about how we expected. It's messy, and I feel too sick to clean right now, but I'll get around to it.

I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop with regards to classes. Programming is still easy; circuits is a little confusing, but I got the hw done, MDC hasn't really started yet, and I'm starting to worry a little bit. The professor is notoriously bad at timing (I had him this summer, and I've heard the exact same thing from everyone else who has taken his class), so it'll probably be hellish in about a month. Lab is a mix of fascinating background info, tedious lab work, and confusing problems. I haven't done hardly any Fluids homework, nor has the prof mentioned a test. ho snap.

But I think I can handle it.

I'm still reading The Three Musketeers. It's getting really good :D

I've been sick all week (not swine flu; I'm not running a fever. Maybe sinus infection or something? I'm having some crazy drainage). I thought I was getting an ailment of the ladyparts, but it seems to have been nipped in the bud. phew.

There's only a couple of dark spots right now. The first is private, and the other is my dear old grandma.

The story of how she got to where she is right now is really too long to tell. It started last summer, and health problems, and self-identity, and things have all lead her to this bed in the hospital. Dad says hospice care is coming in to take care of her every day (well, maybe every day, he didn't specify). Stu and I went with my parents last week-end to visit her. She could hardly speak for having to breathe so laboriously and constantly wetting her lips with a wet washcloth. They said that was much improved over the last time they'd visited.

I think she wants to die. I think she doesn't really want to say it aloud because she doesn't want to hear the family's responses, but she's stopped taking a lot of her medications, eats very little, etc.

I've asked my dad, and he says he and mom haven't been pressuring her to keep living. Maybe I sound like a frigid monster, but I think that a 85 year old woman has earned the right to dictate how her life will play out. Many 85 year olds don't have the luxuries that she has had. Some of them are living quietly in their homes, where no one calls them, no one visits, they have no animals to love. Some are living oblivious in nursing homes. They no longer know who visits them, what their own lives were like, who they have loved.

Grandma Mary is a pretty short lady. I'm not for sure, but I think she's like 5'2" or so. But she was a child of the Depression, and like a lot of her fellows, is stuffed to the brim with stubborn tenacity. I don't think she likes not being able to take care of herself, but it's at the point now that she just isn't able to.

How terrifying it must be to watch your body fail as you're trapped inside of it.

For several years now, I've felt that I was becoming too attention-deficit to make meaningful livejournal posts, and now that the perfect medium for insta-think quick anecdote sharing has arrived, I mean, I'm into it.
Random thought while walking to the bus stop? Twitter it.
One-off link to share? Twitter.

Anyways. I still morally oppose the idea of syndicating my tweets on LJ, but if anyone is interested, I guess I can look into it. I just know that I tend to skip them all on my flist xD (maybe then I should add ljers to twitter then. . No, that would make too much sense)

Summer Session I is over and gone; I got at least one A. I doubt I got two, but hopefully Machine Analysis ends up as a B. I'll find out tomorrow, I guess.

Session II is off to a good start. Lots of people in MechiMat, a lot of whom i at least recognize, although very few are actual mechanical engineers (apparently all the civies took status summer I and are now taking either mechimat or dynamics in summer II. Poor kids). I love Jong though. A semester of Uche has made me appreciate him so much. I was so lazy a year ago! I hope I can avenge that C I made in Statics.

My life is a whorl of classes though. I'm looking forward to this week-end with Stu, and Kishi, and my family. Yes, it's still going forward as planned. Yes, I think it will wendell. No, I don't really feel comfortable discussing it on livejournal, no matter how intimate the group filter.

Last night I redownloaded Princess Maker 2, and played out a life and a half before calling it quits way too late. Got a terrible ending. Finished the second game this afternoon. Slightly better, but still bad ending. I hope the third one goes better.

Tonight I watched Twilight. The university was putting it on as a free outdoors movie, and I partook. There were many girls, a few boys, and some twelve year olds there. It wasn't too bad. the casting was incredible.

I still can't get over being tan. I keep poking my skin and watching it change colors.

and I guess that's my life since the last entry.

Summer school is death; I really enjoy it, but it doesn't leave a lot of time for thinking!

Summary of things that have been going on since the 18th:
seashell necklace turned out FAIL. I strung it all together and it just looked lame. The bits are just kinda hanging out until I think of something better to do with them. (ideas?)

I almost have a tan. Every day I look at myself and I am amazed by the tint of my skin. I'm serious. I haven't been this dark since 2005 (when I went outside in the louisianan sun every day for a month).
I'm almost losing weight. The last few days I've been kinda plateaued, so I don't know what's up with that. I'm not in any hurry anyways; There's still six more weeks of summer.

I really love living by myself right now. I am the mistress of my life and my domicile; don't have to worry about anyone barging in, and I can just not get dressed after a shower. I just love it. (I really love not having my parents around. It was always hard for me to talk on the phone or voice-chat with people knowing that they were in the house with me, or recording singing or anything. So I've been doing a lot of that. I don't know if my voice has improved any, but it's been fun.)

I've been trying to make a decision about something very important for a month; I can't really detail it here because it's too close, too personal, but idk. You all probably know what it is now anyways.

In my schoolwork, we've been using this program called Analytix. It was written in 1989 and last updated in 2002, so you can imagine what that's been like, but you can just draw almost any kind of mechanism you could dream of, and make them move. It's so fulfilling; I enjoy just sketching them out and watching them go through their circuits.

I'm doing pretty well in one of my classes, and fairly poorly in the other. I don't mind [too] much. At least not right now.

I also have no ability to string together a coherent post. Is that the celexa muddying my mind, or am I just not putting enough thought into this?
My anxiety levels are pretty incredible right now, as in, not high at all, so idk I haven't taken any the last couple of nights. We'll see how that pans out. I also don't want to make a doctor's appt to renew my prescription, which is one major aspect. (I have a few months' worth left, but I don't want to totally forget about it and find out I need some RIGHT NOW and not have any) I guess you're supposed to wean yourself off, but I cba to split the pills in half, sooooooo.

mom told me once that as I become an old lady, I'll spend less time shaving my legs and more time tweasing my mustache. DAMMIT MOM, DON"T CONSIGN ME TO SUCH A CRUEL FATE.

Anyways, I had a highly productive night, involving a discrete take home quiz, diff e homework, putting up my clothes, and getting a shower.

I hadn't realized how addicted I have become to my thrice weekly showers. That may not sound like a lot to you guys, but I've gone many many years just twice weekly. In fact, I skip my drill on Fridays to be able to fit that third one in.

There's like three weeks left in the semester. Two of classes, one finals. Then it's apartment move in time. It's so crazy.

I feel like I haven't hardly had time to think the last couple of weeks. I haven't had any big projects, but the whole momenta of my classes have been rising to a crescendo, and it's hard to keep a handle on.

I had two tests last week, and will have two tests in the next two weeks, but I haven't been told when yet. (grrr). I need to do some massive writing for my final submission for Creative Writing (my second story was much more well-received than my first one :)), various homeworks, lots of studying for finals. It's really kinda overwhelming.

I'm really behind in my blog posts at WILT, as well. But, I have drafts for the 8th through the 13th, so now that I've gotten up to the 7th posted, it should be easier to get through those. (phew).

Finally heard back from two places I'd tried to get something with for the summer, two negatories, which is kinda good, because I need these summer classes to stay ahead xD I definitely want to apply for the USRP (nasa!) again next year though.

So yeah, busy busy busy. I'm really looking forward to living in the apartment all summer (we're planning to sign the lease on monday, I think). I already told my parents they should come visit me a lot xD

So my roommate has turned into über-bitch, so I've decided to turn her passive aggression back on her until school's out. If she wants to write facebook notes about how I eat too loud, I'll give her something to write about 8)

Anyways, things are getting kinda hectic as the semester draws to a close. I have a solid idea for my Creative Writing story, but I just don't feel like devoting time to writing. I pumped out nearly half of my quota yesterday, so I don't feel sufficiently pressed for time.

However, I do feel pressed for time with regards to Dynamics. we have a test on Friday on all the material I understand the least. *lesigh*

In non-schoolwork related matters, stu's roommate has gone on a sabbatical from pot, so he's actually kinda pleasant to be around. He doesn't talk to himself about random things, for example. Apparently he's trying to get clean incase he needs drug tests for summer jobs. Whatever it takes, man.

This week-end was pretty fun. It was the big frat-party week-end, so we had a lot of fun going out and watching how crazy it was out there. Hundreds of drunk college students ripe for the plucking.

Stu and I went to Old Navy on Sunday and i got the awesomest shirt ever. I like it a lot.

anyways, I've bored you all enough here. blaaaaaaah bedtime

so, as re: the last entry (locked), I'm still in considerable distress, especially since the university CLOSED the last two days, and thus my source of medical care. >:[

I'm determined to do something tomorrow or ELSE.

anyways, monday afternoon, it started sleeting in the afternoon, so yay no school tuesday. Then it rained all day tuesday so no school wednesday. then tuesday night, it snowed, so yayfun.

Anyways, we've traipsed around the university sliding and skidding and having general chilly fun time, but I'm ready to have something to do again. I'm really unbelievably bored at this moment, which is probably why I'm making this post.

Anyways, the ice is of a magnitude that there were significant power outages and tree splittings. There are several stop lights that are just dark (Even at 5 lane intersections, five lanes in both directions). Lots of people have been without power, and my dorm is hosting some, but the most here has been the lights flickering some. They closed down the elevators as a precaution, so theres been lots of bellyaching over that.

At home, my parents were without power for several hours, relying on the space heaters (propane) to keep warm. I told them not to get rid of the wood stove! they have power now, at least.

In a fit of angry exertion, I de-iced my car this afternoon so stu and I were able to go on a drive and survey the greater countryside.

This evening after dinner, our dinner party went on an excursion around the school grounds, infiltrating the various lawns and engineering buildings. We found a couple of here-unnamed staff using their office monitors for certain recreational activities ;) They didn't have power at their home, which is why they were at the office, so we hung out and shot the breeze and ate a lot of candy which was local.

we wound our way around a lot of broken tree branches, and explored more unlocked buildings. Afterwards, I reclaimed a cup of diet coke I'd left outside towards the beginning of the expedition, and the top had frozen over, rendering it undrinkable! Well, for a while.

Anyways, while we haven't been in school, I've been playing guitar hero, world tour, and I've gotten a lot better. I can actually do hammer-ons and pull-offs now, for example. I think i've completed about 40% of the game on Hard.

Tomorrow I need to catch up on laundry and homework. *lesigh* And medical issues ;)

so I finished up my CAD about 12:15 this afternoon, took an hour more work in the computer lab to get it all plotted, then I studied for cal wth stu until time for class, then sat through cal class and didn't really absorb anything but got my notecard worked on. Went to cad right after that and turned in my final project. he said it was a good B work, but later he said (verbatim) "Allison, I decided to bump it up one". WTF does that mean. I don't know for sure so I'm just going to assume I got a B in CAD until ISIS proves me wrong. Ugh ugh ugh.

And the Cal test was horrific. I didn't even answer all the problems. Some of the problems I just circled because they were kinda close to my answers. Only one or two I felt confident about. Yuck yuck yuck

Then I relaxed for an hour and did three hours of studying/note card writing for materials. I need to recopy everything. I hope I did a better job on this sheet this time because the last two tests my notes were pretty much useless. At least I don't have a final in there (or is that a bad thing because this is my last chance for a B in there?)

and that was my day. I've been pretty shaky all day, and all I want to do is just stop, but I have to keep trudging through tomorrow afternoon, then I can study at a relaxed pace (sorta).

grades as I know them:
linear; a B(?)
statics; a C(?)
materials; a C(?)
cal; an A(?)
CAD; a B (?)

I'm afraid to get my statics test back tomorrow. It'll be a boat of fail, I'm sure. I'm terrified to get my cal test back. I'm trying not to be desperate to find out what cad will be. if those numbers are right then that's a 2.86 uggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggh

Okay, so I recalculated my materials grade; I have a B in there and will have a B in there unless I do a lot worse than I have been doing on teh tests, so that's a little better. A 3.07 at least.

---

okay so that was from like the other day. whatever. gonna clean now and hopefully feel inspired to study.

So this was a pretty busy week for me. I had two tests to freak out over, plus freak out about two more upcoming tests (and then finals in general) and my CAD project. But I think I've got it kinda under control. The Dokal players ( lilredsarah
krabmeat, and friends) can attest to that much! (so sorry guys ;.; )

My final in CAD is coming along pretty nice, I basically just have to make up a bunch of views and dimension everything.

I got an 85 on my linear algebra test, which was about 20 points more than I was expecting. I wish I would get that kind of score in statics (at least I still have the 5 contingent bonus points). I was so close to a B in that class too, and it was so frustrating because I studied the exact problems and still couldn't do them.

I need to get CAD done first, because the final project is pretty much our grade in there, but an hour after that I get to take a fourth cal exam over stuff I haven't studied very well. *lesigh* Then the next day is a Materials test. Need to study study study for all of that. I don't know how I can get it all done this week-end. No fun for me tomorrow, I guess. Maybe I should've started tonight. *freak out*

I finished reading Twilight. I thought it was pretty similar to the Last Vampire series by Christopher Pike, except I mean, Sita and the Cullens are very different, but there are some similarities that strike me as familiar.

Oh, I got a weird injury last night. I was going down the stairs to get some ice from the machine in the laundry room, and I was holding on to the banister, which is good, because I tripped over the steps and fell down a couple before I could get my balance back. Unfortunately, I kinda completed the arc that my arm started me on and rammed my chin and arm right into these ill-placed metal protrusions in the stair structure. It was a good thing those things were blunt, else my chin would be sliced in half atm. It's bruised, so I can't lean my head on my hand very easily :(

and that's my week. I spent an hour or so this morning making a SVG version of that weird faced yellow smiley skt posted in his LJ. FUN TIMES.

going home this week-end defies all the laws of governance of time, but we did it anyways. I guess I don't feel like I've lost much in the transition because I conveniently doped up on nighttime medicine before we left (honest stu, I didn't think it would upset you to not say so beforehand) so I was more or less unconscious 3/4 of the way home.

I took the initiative and did half the laundry (four loads total) while mom was driving my nephews home, and i've just felt like doing things ever since then. I just wish I wasn't coughing up phlegm or that I could breathe out of each nostril.

The sick is a weird thing. I had a sore throat um, wednesday I think, and for some inane reason, that was the same day I decided to try going without claritin. ahahahaha, anyways, throat was marginally better on thursday, but still pretty annoying, but oh *wipes tear*, friday morning. what a joke. I felt like a zombie in class. I actually remember thinking 'man, I wonder if Cochran thinks I'm like this all the time. I don't think I've been making a very good first impression this semester, Iv'e gotta start going to bed on time.' because of course, I was watering out of my eyes and sneezing and coughing still.
I did finally learn the aZn who sits next to me and is also an ME's name though! Ting Yang, how aZn, peegies would be proud.

But yeah, I had entertained some silly notion about working on my CAD assignments instead of returning to my dorm and sleeping, but as soon as I was halfway across the street to the ME building, I realized I had taken all those papers out of my math notebook when studying calculus (FINALLY) the night before, so I did not have the necessary diagrams to replicate. So I was actually kinda relieved and set off for Yocum, my horoscope, and blessed sleep.
I don't even know if I actually took a nap or not. Friday feels like it was a million years ago. I have a feeling I didn't and I'm merely thinking of Thursday, when I took a nap after I got back from materials and didn't wake up until time to go to cal drill. Oops. No lunch for me that day, so I grabbed a snickers and regretted it because I felt all kinds of dizzy, nauseous, and terrible. so much for protein in those things.

My period key keeps flaking out on me, it's kinda annoying, especially since my pinky doesn't really have enough strength to force the issue with it. Wow, I just realized I totally type ps with my ring finger. Are you supposed to do that? Maybe I should start doing so. I just tried to type o with my pinky finger HOLY CRAP THIS IS SO WEIRD FEELING HOW LONG HAVE I NOT BEEN DOING THIS? What finger do I use for q, omg, my left ring finger. No wonder my wpm has been suffering

quaint queen quina quaszqqwaer holy crap this is impossible, tell me I am making this up, you can't seriously expect me to type with these pathetic little fingers.

This is insane. It's like my entire world has turned upside down, all because of a little typing. qpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpq, I can type as with my pinky pretty well, and z. /me is pinky too.

okay that's enough of that, i guess. Today's post was brought to you by the letters p and q, as typed by the pinky fingers of the right and left hands, respectively. (IT"S SO HARD).

Oh yeah, friday night was kinda fun; Fayetteville was having Bikes, Blues, and Barbeque week-end so all the motorcycles were out in force. There was a sign downtown that said 'no weapons allowed' that was pretty lolworthy.

Then stu and I went for a walk to the local library, which is a bitchmile away (it took us like an hour to get there and back) because I didn't want to waste gas to drive there to return our books, and we saw something I had never seen before; a passenger train. Like with people in it, in america. A train. So weird. I'd like to ride the rails sometime, and no, the TGV does not count.

But yeah, the rest of the night is almost like a dream because we definitely stayed up too late without doing really anything, but it was a good time from there. (due to some matters, not the least of which were my infernal allergies, I was not having so good a time before the library-trip, but it all turned out well.)

And now I'm starting to doubt whether you are in fact supposed to type ps with the pinky finger. Oh no, I don't know what to think anymore.

I think that means it's bedtime.

I still wish my period key would work better.

My first cad-thing :O



Took quite a while xD

If I did not have Materials homework, I would be studying for my Statics quiz tomorrow.

If I did not have a Statics quiz tomorrow, I would be doing my cal homework before Drill tomorrow.

If I did not have drill tomorrow, I would be studying for the statics make-up quizzes tomorrow.

If I didn't have a statics make-up quiz on tomorrow, I'd be working linear algebra matrix problems and doing the take home quiz for monday.

If I didn't have the take home quiz for linear, I would be studying for the linear test on monday.

if I didn't have have a linear test on monday, i would be studying for my statics quiz on tuesday.

If I didn't have a statics quiz on Tuesday, I would be studying for the cal test on wednesday.

If I didn't have a cal test on wednesday, I would be doing my materials homework. due thursday.

Can you see how this is going?

Because then I could take my laptop into the bathroom with impunity.

---

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH I hate statics :( It requires this basis in math which is pretty much "hey, remember everything you did in highschool algebra, geometry, and trig? And remember everything you skipped? Also all of that calculus too. You need that".

It's so frustrating!

I hope my next five semesters will be this nice in terms of time.

I woke up frightfully sick yesterday after a bad night's sleep, so I struggled through three hours of class then got in bed and slept from 1-4. Then I went to bed early at 11, (doped up), slept until 8:50, got up and went to class, came back and watched part of clerks with stu, then had another nap from about 12:30-2.

Now if only I had all my homework done!

(plus I wake up at the same time every week day. that makes for awesome good sleep schedules)

First off; I just upended a very cold very full glass of very disgusting drink into my lap and subsequently, the floor. I don't think anything is ruined, but my rug has some disgusting looking yellow stains now.

Second off; during the last HOLYCRAP EGG DROP time at dragcave, I managed to get an abandoned egg that I did not know I had clicked. It then got clicked twice by the person who bred it (I imagine), so now it's sick because I haven't posted it anywhere. So I will post it now so it will get [some] views but no clicks (to make it not sick.)



Doing statics homework is terrifying. There were some crazy geometry problems that I had no idea how to approach. Well they probably required more trig than geometry, but either way. blank. So I didn't work them all! *swtdrp*

I didn't work all the cal either, but I got the first section of homework done. It's all vector stuff so I am happy until we have to derive and integrate or play with the vectors in ways that are not multiplying dividing or trigging.

Linear algebra is just as mystifying today as it was before, but I read the section and could remember things from class as they were outlined in the book.

I'm ready to start CADing :D

So after two days of classes, my arms are brooooooooooooown. (My face is more red, but that is irrelevant).

I have ridden my bike several times. It does not do to say that it is nice being on top of the hill for bike riding privileges. Want to go to the Quad for lunch? Jump on the bike. You'll be there in a fraction of the time. I went out for another ride this evening just for the exercise. My legs got sooooooooo stiff :D (so I stretched them to cool down!).

Stu and Mike and I went to "Hype Night" at the campus fitness facility. There were several activities you could do to earn a t-shirt, few of them strenuous. I owned stu and mike in bean bag toss (made it in the hole 1/8 times, landed on the board about 1/2 the rest of the time). We checked out some of the intramurals; the martial arts were very tempting, but I only gave my e-mail out to the volleyball kids. Then we stepped away from the mic to breathe deep and sat down at the oxygen bar. The scents left something to be desired, but the headiness when you stood up again was delicious. Then stu and I got a picture in front of the eiffel tower (photoshopped), and I asked the man running the table if he'd save the original picture with the background removed on my thumbdrive and he did, so I did some photoshopping of my own back home and have the picture I wanted to badly to get in france :)))))))

Anyways, classes today were Statics and Materials. The materials book made me really excited for the subject, and the professor doesn't diminish that any (except he made a big deal of the book having a lot of errors and typos but he made quite a few himself). Statics however. Phew. I plan to take it very seriously.
(statics is the study of forces on objects and is basically the central idea of mechanical engineering. materials is the study of how materials' structures and chemistry relate to their properties and how to choose them for appropriate situations and is the second central idea of mechanical engineering).

Did my laundry tonight pretty painlessly, though I haven't put my clothes up yet. I bought student tickets to the home games and got some stuff at walmart. This initial week of not having drills or labs is going to spoil me for the semester I'm afraid :(

I got stu to call my house/dad's phone. no answer. He went to mow and I went to be a neurotic wreck, and when he came back a few hours later, i asked him to try again except try my grandma's house also this time. he went silent for several minutes. I guessed correctly this meant that he'd gotten through to someone. He said they were going to be busy tonight with a dinner and that if my flight changed any i should call.

so i never got to talk to my parents, but I do have an idea what they're doing so maybe that'll tide me over ;o

I also talked to my host mom and she said she would drive me to our meeting place to take the coach[bus] to paris. that was such a relief.

"talked" to stu a little and now I'm sitting with half an hour to kill while he's getting dinner. i've got my hair in chopsticks and a cute and hopefully comfortble outfit to wear.

Twenty hours from now, I'll be home, I think.

I don't feel like my french is any better. i learned a few rules, but didn't talk nearly enough to improve in usage. I always got scared saying anything. I really don't know how my studies of the language will go from here. the last few days i've had spanish on the brain, but there's really not much room for a foreign language in my further college career( except on summers)

and hey, my shoulder's finally peeling from paris! took long enough! *scratches skin*

First week done!

I'm glad some of you decided to read the stuff at WILT. I guess I could crosspost them, but then what's the point of having made the blog? anyways, at least that will make it easier to write my report when I get back (for having used my fellowship money on study abroad, they want a 2 page report. On what, I have no idea)

anyways, this is how my days have been going

Wake up about 8:20 or 9:20 depending on if it's MWF (LMV) or TTh (MJ).

Talk to stu before he goes to bed for a little while (this whole being in europe's time zone is just wow, frankly. All my emails come at the wrong times!)

Get dressed, go potty, eat a small petit-déjeuner (chocolate spread has been discovered, I was kinda dismayed when I poured the 'demi crème' (half and half, I think x.x it's definitely not regular lait. they keep it in a cupboard) and it just dissolved. The other american staying with my family was eating some sort of cocoa puffs and it hought this was teh same thing, but nop.

then jeff (pennsylvanian) and I walk the three minutes or so to the bus stop and wait for the 5 bus in the direction of Planoise. (one hour on a bus here is €1,15)
There's another family with study abroad students staying pretty near as I discovered when I found one of them on the bus when we missed the one we usually took (and got us to school ten minutes early)

on mondays, we have two hours of learning with Chakri, and on wednesdays and fridays, with 'Freddy'. Tuesday and Thursday start with an hour of laboratory (computers), then two hours of class. we do things like worksheets and stuff in the classes. It's probably my favorite part.

MWF/LMV has a two hour lunch, TTh/MJ has a one hour lunch. We go back for three hours of laboratory on MWF and two hours of 'atelier' on TTh. The Ateliers are kinda workshops for specific things about learning french. The one I'm in is a writing one, and we've looked at business letters and article writing from notes taken.

On long-lunch days, I usually walk with some of the other arkansans down to the Grande Rue in the Centre-ville to try and find something to eat that doesn't cost $10 a meal. It's pretty hard. I'm getting tired of sandwiches and whatever, but no-one else seems to want to try anything else. I'd like to see what french chinese food is like, but 'that's not why we came to france'

-.-

I also didn't come to france to starve to death on bread! My host mom even agrees with that xD

on short lunch days, I think I'll tend to grab something from the school's cafe on the 5° étage (6th floor)

Then, after school, take the 5 Orchamps bus back to Les Oiseaux and spend a few hours before dinner. I need to start doing my homework before dinner because dinner typically ends after 9PM and by then I need to start considering getting into bedtime mode xD It's really a big change from 5PM dining. I'll think 'oh, I can do this after dinner' or 'Oh we'll be having dinner soon, I shouldn't eat anything' but it's WRONG. I think the earliest we ate was 7:30 when it was just the dad and the kids (last night actually), and he left again right afterwards.

My evenings are usually passed reading the internet and talking to stu <33333333333 that is, I read the internet until stu wakes up xD

I think I'll start with renewed vigor with Harry Potter now that I know the tense it's written in xD That can have a big affect on your comprehension!

This house has so many macs. It's amazing. I'm pretty sure I saw another MBP or maybe a power book when I walked past one of the daughter's rooms. Then there's the big 17in one the mom has, the iMac, the eldest (I think) daughter has an iPhone, the other exchange student has a powerbook. It's just all amazing. The girl I sat next to on the plane had a powerbook! It was the first time I'd seen one. It was so thick compared to the mbp xD

They also have a femme de menage come in on saturdays apparently. I wonder what her name is :o I wonder if she'll want to clean my room ;o it's such a mess. everything's sitting out because I don't really have any drawers xD well there are drawers, but I don't want to disturb the stuff that's inside them.

I also wondered if they'd invite me to lunch this morning. The family is only obligated to provide two meals a day (breakfast and dinner thus far), and I was so hungry this morning that I got really upset and was working hard to stiffle my crying when Manon knocked at the door and said they were about to eat.

Jeff (penn state) had been in his room just a few minutes earlier, and she asked me if I knew where he'd gone and I didn't, so maybe he had the same thoughts and decided to go get something for himself, or more likely he went to play soccer with some locals (he's done that a lot)

But yeah, I have no confidence about anything here. The stress of not being able to express myself and not knowing how to ask or what will happen is definitely taking a toll on me. At least I do know now that Freddy is all too happy to help me with anything french I want to know, and I do feel comfortable enough with the other arkansans and some of the penn state people (I only knew one girl when I came here) to go places with them and just hang out together. That stuff is the hardest really; much harder than missing stu (being able to talk to him online has been so wonderful. If I'm this much of a wreck now, I don't want to think about what it'd be like without having him handy at least part of the day).

I decided to go with people to Paris on the 20th for two nights. I'm sure it will end up being amazing, but I freaked out so much yesterday when i found out how much just the train tickets would cost. (€71) but I'm determined to not be a chickenwuss about this. I also determined I wouldnt be a chickenwuss last night, and I went out with a bunch of people. It ended up being a pretty good time, but I was so freaked out when I was waiting. I hate being in limbo about something.

I did pretty well (~85) on my physics test last night despite not having all the formulas down. I hope I won't have to take the final, but I'm probably too close to getting a B in the class to get away with it. (apparently the selection process is pretty subjective by the professor)

Took my last cal test (bar the final) today. I'm kinda worried because it really seemed very easy, but I'm afraid it might be faking it(wtf there's a word I wanted to use there and I couldn't think what it was, suggestions? oh yeah deceptive!).

I really really really lack the ability to go back and check my work. If I do check it, I have to erase the entire problem, because I can't concentrate with previous work there making me look at it and making me think in the same brain patterns as I did before. Is anyone else like that?

I have my GNEG presentation tonight. One of my group members was worried, one said that I shouldn't worry, and then the other is terse as usual. I haven't studied, but I did print out 3 copies of our slides to give to the panel judging us. Stu's group had to massively rework theirs because they didn't demonstrate enough of a grasp of the electronics involved with it, so he was down in the computer lab last night while I was freaking out because I can't do trig problems. xD

We honors fellows had a little dinner last night before the physics test (I could've been studying for cal! or writing the correct formulas on my notecard!) I think I interacted more with my roommate yesterday getting ready for, attending, and discussing it afterwards than I have pretty much any given month of the last two semesters xD

But that she was happy to interact is good, because if I haven't made a very big positive impression on her, it is a positive impression none the less and I'm not the most awkward person she knows! Is that a win? I think that's a win.

Here are the finals as I am worried about them:
I'm not: American Government, French
Oh, god: Physics, Cal

and I think that sums up the semester fairly well!

Oh, one last thing!
There's a guy in my french class who is in this Hmong students organization and today they're having a little sidewalk rally to protest the genocide of hmong people in laos. most people don't know anything about any genocides except the holocaust, but they go on.
Here is a geocities link of dubious quality (I haven't read it thoroughly) to give an idea of what's going on
http://www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/Lobby/4621/

just be aware. It's obvious that we are not told everything that goes on except as it pertains to the US becoming greater, but that's no excuse for not finding out about those things going on. (hello darfur!)